cooking · Life

Reasons not to let your boyfriend cook

1. He has been saving all the leftover butter and sugar packets from work

2. He has been shopping at the salvage grocery store again.  Marc is endlessly fascinated by a grocery where nothing costs more than a dollar.   The swirled choclate chips above are so old that they will not melt when you try to eat them.

3.  He’s been reading recipes off the back of Kroger brand saltine boxes for “Saltine Chocolate Pieces”

4.  He has too much time on his hands and a clean kitchen.

All of the above =

What we have here is saltine crackers, covered in butter and sugar, baked and then topped with stale white and regular chocolate chips.

The carnage:

Yes, he opened all those butter and sugar packets for this recipe.  My favorite part?  It didn’t even call for white sugar, he was substituting…

You want the recipe?  Okay…

Saltine Chocolate Pieces

1 sleeve Kroger Saltines 

3/4 cup brown sugar

1cup butter

12 oz chocolate chips

Preheat oven to 400F.  Line a 10×15-inch cookie sheet with foil; spray very lightly with cooking spray.  Cover cookie sheet with saltines.  Boil sugar and butter for 3 minutes.  Pour mixture over saltines and spread evenly.  Bake at 400 for 5 minutes.  Remove from over and sprinkle with chocolate chips.  Let set 1 minute, then spread melted chips with spatula.  Sprinkle with nutes.  Cut on diagonal then break up into pieces.  Can be frozen.  Yield: 30 pieces. 

Let me be clear here… under no circumstances should you attempt to make this.   I haven’t personally tried it, but it just looks like some sort of recipe that would include directions like “Now have an adult put crackers in the oven for you.”

I think I *heart* Marc for insisting on making this.  Maybe I’m crazy, but I think it’s adorable that he insists on using up everything in the pantry.  I can’t always get behind his ideas (pickle juice as a mixer? I think not) but it makes him unique… and a little crazy, but that’s ok.  I like crazy, because crazy in interesting, and always beats out normal and boring.

3 thoughts on “Reasons not to let your boyfriend cook

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